As I write this, today is the deadline for people to submit
their responses to the UK Gender Recognition Act consultation (it will have passed by the time you're reading this) and news has just broken of the Trump administration's musings around the possibility of eradicating trans identities. There is always a
lot of Twitter ‘discussion’ (to put it politely) around Trans issues but lately
the noise has reached maddening levels. Pretty tough if you’re just a normal
Trans person trying to go about your ordinary cat-meme youtube-recipe life.
That’s not me, by the way, I am cisgender, but I'm interested in, and disturbed by, the current struggle for Trans equality and the escalation of the oppression of my Transgender friends and family.
Also in the last few weeks the new Doctor Who series has
started, and I have a vested interest in that too (politically speaking, the
world needs Doctor Who right now. Tell me I’m wrong. Don’t, because I’m not)
and for me it’s impossible not to conflate the righteous development of the
Doctor with the march of Trans liberation (and actually the liberation of
humanity in general). It’s about phases.
Lots of people tell Transgender kids that they’re ‘going
through a phase’. Sometimes they hear it from family. Sometimes they hear it
from social media. They hear it from teachers. They hear it from National newspapers,
famous and beloved writers, popstars… It’s everywhere; this idea that whatever
it is they’re going through is somehow trivial and not as meaningful as they
think.
I know what it is to go through a phase, as many of us do. I loved Bros
when I was 14. Like, I really loved them. I’d stay awake at night and listen to
the Bros Front fan cassette on my personal stereo over and over. I drew
pictures of them. I wore the lager bottle caps on my shoes. I delighted in Matt’s
impersonation of Stevie Wonder on the Des O’Connor show. I mourned Craig. I was
in it for life. It lasted for two years.
I want to say something about phases though, because ‘phase’
can mean a couple of different things. We use it a lot to mean ‘trend’ or
something which passes quickly. We imagine that when the craze is over (like Lo
Lo Balls. Remember those?) we will quickly return to our lives before the craze
happened (albeit with a broken ankle if you had a Lo Lo Ball).
But ‘phase’ can also mean a transition. We talk about the
phases of adolescence, or sometimes the government will ‘phase in’ a particular
economic change. ‘Phase’ here meaning those periods which have certain stages in
order to progress towards a particularly altered state. We all know that by the
end of adolescence we are changed- we don’t return, thankfully, to how we were
before the transition began. We don’t know exactly how we’ll turn out, what
twists or turns there might be as we discover who we are, but we do know that
one phase ends and another begins- that we don’t have a ‘reset’ button- life
changes us and our human journey is one of changes which don’t really ever
stop.
In Doctor Who the Doctor might have regenerated into a woman
now, and people will remind us, ‘She is still the essential Doctor though’, and
this might be true, but it will also be true that being a woman will change the
Doctor. She will never not have been a woman again, if we can cope with the
timey wimey grammar. It’s complicated, but that’s OK.
If you’re wondering what all this has to do with my writing,
then I can tell you that it has everything to do with it. I spend a lot of time
thinking about characters before I ever write down a note about them, and right
now I have this little thought in my head- something, somebody, in a phase,
changing… It’s probably going to be different to what I’ve written before. The essential
author will still be there, though. But it will be a change and, I hope, a
development.
I don’t know what it is about us humans that we resist the
phases of our own and one another’s lives. Sometimes I think I do it more than
others, but I’m trying to be more aware of the tendency. One of my favourite
verses by William Blake is with me as I try to let things and people and myself
move freely in and out of phases.
He who binds to
himself a joy
Doth the winged life
destroy
But he who kisses the
joy as it flies
Lives in eternity’s
sunrise
So I suppose I am writing in praise of phases today, whether
in fictional characters or the people who make them up, or in our own
characters or bodies, which change all the time. Maybe we can learn to embrace
the changes. If not it is our loss really, because we know the changes will keep on
happening. Play us out, St Bowie.
5 comments:
Very thought-provoking interesting point about the life phases we resist. Thank you.
Thanks, that's a very interesting post! And true to my experience of writing, being trans, and other things beside.
Must admit, I'd never heard of the word cisgender till now.
I do struggle a bit with all the various gender permutations, and the sometimes associated conflations with sexuality.
I've only just managed to get my head around the recent 'Gay Cake' legal dispute.
I thought I'd somewhat addressed that issue on my own blog.
Until someone said it better for me.....
" try getting into a taxi p*ssed, or going to a Rangers shop and ask them to print "King Billy 1690" on the back of your new football shirt...".
Cisgender is to transgender as straight is to gay, is one way of thinking about it.
Thanks everyone.
Catherine- thank you, I am very glad to hear this.
Andrew- it's not necessary to understand everything, as long as we are kind to people and speaking out against oppression even when it doesn't affect us personally. When we struggle to understand things then the thing to do is to listen to, and take the word of, those who live the experience that we ourselves lack.
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