Thursday 10 February 2022

I do solemnly swear... by Alan McClure

 


Earlier this week I followed a thread in a facebook group for children’s writers. A member had asked a question regarding the appropriate use (very occasional, carefully framed) of expletives in YA literature. A host of helpful responses outlined the attitude of the publishing industry and the likely advice of agents, which could be generally summed up as, “For goodness’ sake, don’t do it. Parents, teachers and librarians will object and it will make your work less publishable."

I absolutely appreciate that for many writers the desire to achieve publication is paramount, and for good reason – it validates our compulsion to write, gets our work to its audience and in many ways helps us to hone our craft. But a few things revealed in the discussion really troubled me. I don’t doubt that the advice given was accurate and borne of hard-won experience, but my hackles instantly rise at any advice that potentially limits a writer’s expressive palette.

I should admit, early on, that I’m a big fan of a bit of well-placed swearing. There are those who strongly object to it, and I don’t altogether dismiss their concerns – but there are also those who strongly object to references to religious inclinations other than their own, sexual orientations they don’t share, and scientific data which ill fit their world view. Strong objections are interesting to hear and should be aired freely, but should never be the ultimate arbiter of what we can and cannot say. Swearing, I sincerely believe, is amongst the greatest joys of language – spontaneous, visceral, enlivening, it provides an instant release for pent-up emotions and a rich percussion to the music of speech.

Now, I’m not a complete eejit – as a primary school teacher I’m very aware that there are situations in which it is inappropriate. In over a decade in front of classes I’m pleased to say I’ve never slipped into fluent Anglo-Saxon, whatever the provocations (and there have been many!). It is perfectly possible to address every issue, reflect on every problem and discuss every conflict without recourse to four letter words. Note, if you will, my admirable restraint in writing these posts – nary an f-bomb will you find.

The thing is, I neither want to write about nor read about characters who are exclusively of a primary teacher’s mindset. I want to see realistic interactions in books. I want to see situations that reflect real life as I’ve experienced it, even if they’re taking place in fantastical settings. My armoury of expletives was honed, sharpened and polished as a primary school pupil, and to this day I seldom meet folk with quite such a liberal creativity in the field as the pre-teen lads and lasses with whom I shared my schooldays. I know perfectly well that the kids I teach are as well versed in this field of linguistics as Billy Connolly at his most florid, and while I’m happy for them to reserve it for the playground (it would cause pandemonium in the classroom) I’m not such a hypocrite as to suppose that exposure to a certain collection of letters on a page will fry their innocent young brains beyond repair.

We urgently want our children to read. We urgently want them to see themselves in books, and to relate the power of the written word to the power of the spoken word. YA books frequently deal with complex relationships, extreme violence, themes of horror, loss, sexual awakenings and all manner of grittiness, but for me this is instantly defused when characters resort to anodyne substitute curses like ‘effing’, ‘blinking’ and ‘flipping’. We take our young readers for fools when we slot these unsatisfactory nonsenses into dialogue and I’ve no doubt we dilute their enjoyment of the work.

If a writer feels that swearing is a sign of low character, then use it as a marker of low character. If a writer feels it is sign of limited vocabulary, then use it sparingly alongside the most gloriously erudite vocabulary you can muster. We are slowly and painfully getting to the point where colloquialisms and minority languages are being accepted in children’s writing (and a big shout-out is due to indie publishers for leading this charge) but there remains a censoriousness in mainstream publishing that assumes no agency on the part of our young readers. We, as writers, have a duty to present the full range of expressive possiblity that language provides, and to trust our readers to make their own judgements.

Of course it is up to the individual writer how they wish to express themselves, and for many, if not most, that will include a degree of self-censorship in the interests of avoiding unecessary conflict. For all my ranting above, I don’t personally pepper my writing with the sort of language I delight in whilst blethering with pals down the pub. But I have grave concerns when I read of an industry-wide orthodoxy that renders writing, particularly of dialogue, unrealistic, enfeebled and limited: I fear it is likely to drive potential readers further towards other art-forms (TV, films, video games) which suffer from no such delicacy. At a time when the news daily throws up political language of the utmost callousness, cruelty and entitlement, all couched in polished, expletive-free verbiage, I feel an urgent need to liberate the earthy, universal honesty of a good old swear.

6 comments:

Caroline Mackie said...

Brilliantly put Alan. I myself am an inveterate user of the worst of swearies. It's about knowing when to be real. Drop a brick on my foot, I really am not going to shout, 'Goodness me!'
I don't swear (or wouldn't have) in front of my mother, or some old lady (who could probably teach me a few belters) but I've heard a priest swear so...
Using expletives (real ones and not 'You bally bounder you!') at the correct time in a story for YA, should definitely be done. 'Permission' be damned (oops, used a bad word there). Kids especially need spoken to in real terms. No talk of tinkles and KiKis, yes your mum has sex, yes your dad got drunk and shagged that burd... it happens in real life too! Yes, people die, politicians lie... and refugees are often treated abominably... do they all say oopsie when their boat is turned back? Where appropriate and fitting to a story, a good swear word will make it right.
I live in Holland and really realised just how much a swear word IS only a word when reading ENGLISH swear words (good bad ones too) in a *school* poster, plastered around town. And had to learn the ridiculous things they call swearwords here ('Away you and get cancer!'... or typhoid, that's a good one... sicknesses of all sorts are really, really awful things to shout at someone here) (I mean, not so nice in English but not a thing we'd use as a sweary.)
It's like, well I would hang a horse-shoe like a U, to stop the luck running out. Here they hang it the other way up, to allow the luck to flow. So it's all just perception. All the Mary Whitehouses of the world will object to swearing (we know this!) but they are not the barometer here. Not for you, not for me!! The kids reading the stories are, and a writer should use what is needed to make a story of whatever ilk real. It's not always 'necessary' either, sometimes it just fits and stupid publishers should know this by now. It's 2022!!
Times change, sure... and of course, we don't want ABC books for toddlers listing all things swearie, it's not that. But I have always hugely objected to men saying 'oh, pardon my French!' because they deigned to swear in my oh so delicate female presence. Kids don't need brought up in an all-out sweary environment, no, and it's nice if they too learn to curb things and not shout it out in church or something, but I remember being totally shocked upon hearing my own father swear (and it was at me!) because he never had before. And yet there was no shock at all to hear adults in my husband's family use swearing like normal. All the 'not in front of the children' nonsense is BAD.
Anyway... thanks for writing this. Keep doing what you're doing.
Caroline

Alan McClure said...

Brilliant, Caroline - glad to know I'm not alone in this!

Rusty said...

I use all the swearies. I sometimes make up dirty language for fun. I will also expurgate myself for fun. It’s strange how quickly the brain will accept expurgated language as the real thing.

Here are some swears that I use that are expurgated or invented.

“Lick! Drip! And Cheese!”
“Smegma!” This is nasty.
“Fistula!” This is worse.
“Christmas in New Jersey!” The place can be changed. But three syllables works best.
“Christ in a sidecar!” Technically, this is a vainglorious use of The Lord’s name. But, it is tempered by psychedelic nonsense.
“Frack!” Or “Fracking!” Fracking is horrible nonsense anyway. This is obviously a dirty word.
“Frick.” Sometimes this is “Friggin’ Frick,” making the “Frick” a more sexual reference. Sometimes this is “Frick and Frack,” which is an anachronistic reference to a pair famous figure skating clowns!

Happy swearing!

Alan McClure said...

Marvellous! It is, for sure, a wonderful realm for invention.

Steve Gladwin said...

And of course 'Red Dwarf' turned the shortened form of smegma into a simple 'smeg' and created a universally useful swear thatg has all but become an art form. And the guy with the whistle in Father Ted experimented with fup, but it had nowhere near as much a hilarious effect as hearing Mrs Doyle saying 'Feck this'. And 'feck that'.

Paul May said...

Very interesting post, thanks, Alan.
I think it's worth mentioning that there is a danger in having people swear in children's books, which is that it can very easily make a book feel dated, in the same way that using the latest street slang does. I've been asked to change words many times and you may find it surprising to know that I was asked to change 'Hell!' in a MG novel. I did find a better, more characterful word for an old Norfolk farmer to use but ironically 'Blust!' is probably short for 'God damn and blast it' which is pretty much the same as 'Hell'.
Anyway, I do feel that in most cases 'he/she/they swore' possibly with additional adverb - softly, violently etc - solves the problem. Dialogue in books is never particularly realistic anyway. Real conversation is far too boring to put in books, or indeed in the movies or on TV, though of course it needs to convince us that it might be real.
And as for that phrase 'it may damage your sales', I will just repeat what a well-known picture book author said when I was with a couple of other new authors celebrating being short-listed for an award. 'Enjoy the moment, guys. Just remember when your sales fall they'l drop you like a hot potato!'