Sorry! So sorry! Won't happen again!
I can't believe it. You forgot your ABBA post?
Sorry! I don't know how...I started my new job this week! It's been a bit intense.
You claimed you could work four days a week and keep on doing everything you've been doing.
Well, maybe not quite everything -
Writing books and promoting them. School visits. Teaching. Mentoring. Blogging. 'Networking' on social media...
I may have to cut back a bit on that...
Haven't you still got a book to finish this month? What about those essays you're marking? And your musical! Still unfinished!
It's coming on great!
It's been years!
I know...I will get it all done. I'm very good with deadlines.
How many deadlines do you need?
It's just...a regular income...
I thought you were an artist!
I am an artist. Or am I? It's just that I'm fed up with having no regular money coming in. And sometimes no money coming in.
Working for no money is the way to start your career. I heard some guy on the radio going on about it.
I heard him too. Idiot. It's not that I earn no money. It's just that it's never quite enough, and it comes in little bits. Did you see that story in the paper about middle class people who don't have the money to pay an unexpected bill for £500? Well, that. Not quite that, but nearly.
Don't make me laugh! I thought you authors were rolling in it. What about that JK -
Don't mention that name!
Or David Walli -
Stop! Look, I could tell you a few things about publishing, if I had time..but I have to get to the office...
What about your proofs? When are you going to read them? Do you really think you can be professional with two jobs?
Actually three jobs. And I'm a Patron of Reading, which is a bit like a job. Did I tell you about the club we've set up for reluctant readers?
Sounds good...but how are you going to find time?
Fridays! I have Fridays off. I'm going to write and mark essays and mentor and...and....
And your family?
They're almost all adults! And it's time my husband learned to cook.
You mean he doesn't cook?
We've only been married 20 years. It's a process. Speaking of cooking, I need to make my breakfast. And my packed lunch. Newspaper offices have changed since I last had a job, ooh, seven years ago now. It's all mineral water, bags of almonds and chopped carrots.
I thought you said there was a huge box of biscuits for stress relief?
I'm ignoring them.
I still want to know how you're going to write books.
I think - it's a gamble - that I'll be more productive when I'm not worrying about generating income all the time. Besides, I'm ahead of myself. I've got a book coming out in August.
Soon, I know. I will do the proofs on Friday. Maybe even tonight...
Is this the book that's all in dialogue?
It is. Yup. Not as easy as I thought.
Going to try that one again?
What's it called again?
Cuckoo. Out August 4. About a boy who's a household name with no home.
You love that strapline that your editor came up with, don't you? This whole post is just a piece of promotion, isn't it?
Multi-tasking! Argh...look at the time! Got to go!
Get you, working person.
Keren David is the author of six YA books. A seventh, Cuckoo is published in August. She is a visiting lecturer at City University. She also teaches at City Lit. She is writing a musical based on her book Lia's Guide to Winning the Lottery. She started work this week as Features Editor of the Jewish Chronicle.