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| Autumn Roses - https://www.instagram.com/lucywriter/ |
Last month I wrote from the depths of a bad depressive episode. I am very grateful for all your kind comments on that piece, and I'm glad it helped some of you. Unfortunately there is no quick fix for the black dog's grey fog. It's not something I can turn off with a switch, however much I want to. Writing a book right now is like wading through a sea of frozen treacle with lead boots on. Doing events is exhausting - because I have to put on that 'mask of normal' I talked about, and that takes its toll. But, and this is important, I survive. I am here. Every day that happens is a victory. Within that, the pleasure of small things becomes vital - as does acknowledging them.
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| Vitis Cognetiae - https://www.instagram.com/lucywriter/ |
Because my creative well is so dry, I have turned to another sort of creativity to try to fill the gap. I've always liked photography, so I've started keeping a virtual diary of gratitude for those small things on my Instagram page. Trying to put the joy back into the creative process is essential for me, and I'll try anything to get a tiny bit of that joy back, even for just a minute. For now, it's playing around with filters and layouts, seeing things in both colour and black-and-white. It's about really looking at objects - textures, shadows, light - and trying to convey that through the media of word and picture. As every picture book writer knows, it's the marriage of image and text which makes the whole thing light up and come alive, but in this case it's the image which is important for me. I want so very badly to move out of the monochrome world I'm living in and get back to the place where colour sings.
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| Fire - https://www.instagram.com/lucywriter/ |
I know this type of laid-bare honesty isn't for everyone. But for me it's a survival tool.
OUT NOW from Orchard, Cleo (UKYA historical fantasy about the teenage Cleopatra VII) '[a] sparkling thriller packed with historical intrigue, humour, loyalty and poison.' Amanda Craig, New Statesman
Also out now: new Beasts of Olympus series "rippingly funny" Publishers Weekly US starred review
11 comments:
Those photos have given me a moment of joy on a very grey winter morning. Thank you!
What a good and beautiful way of fighting the heavy dark side of life. Thank you for sharing, and all power to your creative visual, verbal and living parts of life!
I find photography helps me too - perhaps it's the wordlessness of it that makes it a possible and feeding kind of creativity.
Good for you, Lucy. You may not feel like an inspiration but please believe me: you ARE. xxx
Being creative in a different area is a good way to rest the usual 'word' channels and still be engaging with your inner creativity. Images and colour are important forms of expression and if that is what you need for now, enjoy it and be gentle with yourself. x
xxx
I can kind of relate to this. I'm glad the pictures help you cope. They are gorgeous, so know you are also giving others a moment of joy when we look at them. Hope the fog clears soon, and sunshine and stars become sparkly for you xx
Do colouring books help at all? I find they give one part of your brain a rest, and let a different bit take over.
Photography is my 'go to' on days when the inspiration ceases. I can spend hours cleaning up my iPhoto... all 20 000 pics there! Alway aim to keep it under 20 000! But haven't joined Instagram for fear of being seduced. Your pics are wonderful. How great to have that seduction of filters. Truly beautiful. Just enjoy them! Sending lots of energy Lucy.
Thanks Lucy. Made me feel like I should be doing the same thing. Wonderful and life affirming and that's what makes it all worth while.
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