Things to Do On a Difficult Rewrite
1. Change the font. This makes it look like a different book.
2. Change the names of the main character. Just press ‘Replace’ and suddenly you’ve got a brand new heroine called Elizabeth instead of ‘Kelly’.
3. Spend weeks cutting and pasting on the understanding that the story was really good you just told it in the wrong order.
4. Don’t do any housework.
5. Drink a lot of red wine.
6. Be horrible to your loved ones.
7. Go into bookshops. Search for your books and look at the finished product. You did it last time – you can do it again.
8. Look at the first chapter closely –yep, that’s OK. Look at the last chapter – that’s OK too. It’s just the bit in between that’s the problem.
9. Consider the fact that maybe it’s too grown up for your audience. Remove sex and violence.
10. Consider the possibility that it’s too young for your intended audience. Add sex and violence and themes about the existence of god.
12. Go away for a weekend and walk along a windy beach until you experience a moment of clarity. The novel’s not working. It’s not convincing. You’re going to have to rewrite vast sections of it.
13. Rewrite vast sections of it.