

It was the words ‘As told by..’ on the cover of his books that got me thinking…….
I am not short of ideas. They are literally bursting out of me. What I am short of is that special mixture of time, solitude, self belief and humour to wrestle my sentences into submission on the page. Writing for me is a physical struggle that often leaves me punchdrunk and dazed. Sometimes it feels like torture. It certainly is for poor Frugal Husband who has to put up with my moods.

So I allowed myself a ‘Barbara Cartland’ moment imagining myself bedecked in jewels lying on a sofa dictating my ideas to an earnest Creative writng MA graduate who was now working for me – as an unpaid intern of course.
‘Just finish off that chapter Orlando I have a box set of The Killing to watch!’After all ‘daybed’ is one of my favourite words.
NO, NO, NO. This won’t do at all.
I can’t tell my story to someone.
If I told my story to somebody else it would dissolve in the telling.
If I told my story to somebody else I would miss out on those magic writing moments like the one I had on Monday. After staring at a picture in the Wallace Collection the elusive words of an opening chapter began to take shape. My lips are sealed for the moment.
It’s my story to tell.
I can’t tell my story to someone.
If I told my story to somebody else it would dissolve in the telling.
If I told my story to somebody else I would miss out on those magic writing moments like the one I had on Monday. After staring at a picture in the Wallace Collection the elusive words of an opening chapter began to take shape. My lips are sealed for the moment.
It’s my story to tell.
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